D&D Origin Month V: The Birth of Ceilos

In an Elvish enclave was born a new life.  He never knew his mother (or in some stories his father, but usually mother), and many of the elves looked down on him, as he aged and matured faster, and was a firebrand in the community.  The youth leaves home, and begins an unusual journey.  His story is a common one among Half-Elves, humanoids with a Human parent and an Elvish parent, and many Half-Elves, as well as Players are fed up, here's Eddard Stark with the report.

Everyone has their main character, the one that defines them, one that they bring in to games every once in a while.  Spoony has his bard Tandem, being perhaps one of the most famous of these defining characters.  I have Ceilos Longstrider, sometimes Canis Longstrider (more often recently I have gone with Canis, because he is hungry like the wolf, and Lupus is unfortunately the name of a not-so-nice disease) is mine.  He is a Half-Elf Rang.... oh wait!!!  COME BACK!!!!  HE'S HIS OWN CHARACTER!!!  I PROMISE!!!!!

Ceilos/Canis is a Half-Elven Ranger, who feels the pull of both worlds, but unlike others who brood with angst and/or try to find their own way, he is kind of okay with it.  He is half Human and half Elf for a reason, whatever that may be, and tends to have a positive demeanor about it.  His weapons are the longbow, the kukri and the scimi.... I see your cursor moving towards that "x", keep reading, you might learn something.

Ceilos/Canis is more unique than you're probably thinking

I first played Ceilos in a campaign lead by a rather awesome DM.  He had a hawk to help him track, and was an expert at that, as well as fighting, originally with a khopesh (its similar to a scimitar, but can do trip attempts) and a kukri.  It was with that kukri that he slew the Hydra that blocked off the entrance to a castle.  It was him that searched for a magic crown, and never returned (the guy stopped DMing, graduation kind of ended it).  However, in Neverwinter Nights, Dungeons and Dragons Online, and in other campaigns (and in my test party to test out encounters/dungeons) he lives on.

In some regards, Ceilos/Canis took on his own existance.  It's very interesting to see a character come to life like that.  When I play him my actions come almost instinctively, as if he tells me what to do.  Of course, it is because I know how to play rangers, and Ceilos/Canis has a very similar personality to mine.  With most other characters there is usually a moment's thought, or its me just acting a role.

It was also with Ceilos that I finally saw how much fun role-playing could be.  There were a few times before making Ceilos that I wanted to stop, because I couldnt find my niche, but then I found it, and things were wonderful.  All players have their niche.  Some know the rules and like paperwork, and play excellent Wizards and Druids, some enjoy the cathartic moments of being a Barbarian or a Fighter.  Some love to role-play and act and play Bards and... er... Bards.  I love the Ranger, because in some ways, they are explorers at heart, and my wanderlust gets to be exercised.  Ceilos/Canis started his adventures by running.

And he's be running ever since.

Had to be done!

And with my Ranger, I have bee through a lot.  Its part of the reason I can say with a straight face that I have slain Dragons and faced the horrors of the Nine Hells, that I have stood fast against the undead and spoken with nymphs.  I have been into the woods and out of the woods.  I have seen the mind fuckery of abberations like Beholders and Mind Flayers, and saw beauty in fictional squirrels and in Elven art.  

Sure, none of those things ACTUALLY happened, it was all in my head, but why should that mean it isn't real?

And I think that is the beauty of role-playing.  All those things ultimately affect us, despite being words and numbers on pages and miniatures and images upon tables.  I have grown so much as a human being not because of the role-playing and fantasy and imagination, but because of the things they brought to the table in front of me.  What started as a timid boy who was sort of self-loathing, at let some preachers on TV tell him what is real became a man, who thinks for himself and stands strong in what he believes him.  And, for once in his very life, he loved himself.  That man is me.

I am proud to be a role-player.

My Life is so Totally Ruined (or, Why Pat Robertson is an Idiot)

Polarizing men create polarized opinions about them.  Some of them are celebrated, and some of them are reviled.  Some of them start off either reviled or celebrated and, over time, become the opposite.  Senator Joseph McCarthy was, at one time, thought to be a hero defending the American way from those dirty evil Commies.  Today, his name is associated with McCarthyism, which has become an associated term with witch-hunting, for attacking others with little evidence, to assume guilt until proven innocent.

Pat Robertson, is one of these men.

For the unaware, Pat Robertson hosts a Evangelical Christian show known as "The 700 Club."  It is a religious news/lifestyle show that discusses current events and the like through an Evangelical, Fundamentalist weltanschauung.  Stating that, I'm sure it is pretty obvious that I would disagree wildly with both Mr. Robertson and The 700 Club:

Him                                                                                                Me
Christian                                                                                         Pagan
Conservative                                                                                   Liberal
Homophobic                                                                                   No H8
Successful show host                                                                       Unsuccessful Blogger
Looks nice in a traditional tie                                                            Bowties are cool

I could honestly go on and on, but I think you get the idea by now.

Opposites

So imagine that I am going on some of the news-sites I sometimes go to so I can read up on current events, and I come across Pat Robertson claiming that Dungeons and Dragons literally destroyed peoples lives.  Forget for a moment, that I am a huge nerd and play D&D often, what evidence does he have that D&D is some sort of ticking spiritual time-bomb?  Sure, there was that ONE incident that happened back in the 70's, an incident that launched such things like Mazes and Monsters and Patricia Pulling's Bothered About Dungeons and Dragons.  However, that is only one story of many.  In fact, The American Council of Suicidology discovered no links between role-playing and suicide.  In fact, there are studies that show that RPGs like D&D and such are beneficial in therapy.  Interesting what research brings up!

I would not be knocking Mr. Robertson here if he stated something like "Dungeons and Draons is antithetical to Charismatic/Evangelical Christianity."  I would honestly just look at it as just an religious opinion on the subject.  However, Dungeons and Dragons destroying lives?  I think I have mo anecdotal evidence to back up the Sociological and Psychological research to show that RPGs have beneficial affects on people.  I've heard about how RPGs got kids off the streets and got them to turn their lives around, to take a philosophical view on ethics.  Many actors have played RPGs in their career, respectable actors like Judi Dench (Dame Judi Dench to you).

We cannot deny how much ass Dame Judi Dench kicks!

I know I know, appealing to celebrities does not a point prove, but   I don't see her career in the gutter, and she played.

Pat Robertson might look at me and see a Satan-worshiper that sacrifices babies and desecrates hosts; that doesn't change the fact that I am a college graduate and a philanthropist who feels a spiritual connection to many Gods instead of one singular one.  The thing is, is that I wouldn't sit back and call Pat Robertson a Christofascist that believes that a woman must marry her rapist or that you have to go far from any dwellings only to take a shit in a hole, or that The 700 Club leads to delusions and ruins families.  I have no proof of that, thus making that claim would make me no worse than he.  Mr. Robertson is human, just like us all, and has his flaws and the like.

But from what I can tell, from both research and anecdotes, no, Dungeons and Dragons is no more likely to ruin your life than reading the Bible daily or shopping at Target or Wal-Mart.

Pagan Blog Project: Isis-Demeter

In 1999, scholars Timothy Freke and Peter Gandy wrote a book called, The Jesus Mysteries.  The book contended that Jesus was originally a deity of a Hellenistic Judaism group that was like other dying-rising Gods of the time, a syncretic deity labled as Osiris-Dionysus.  While the book was filled with errors about both Early Christianity and the Mysteries that even a bout of passive research would uncover (and errors parrroted by Zeitgeist), the idea of Osiris-Dionysus is an ancient one.  The Neoplatonists of Late Antiquity noticed this, and the Greeks syncretised Dionysus and Osiris for centuries prior to that.  Alexander Hislop, in his anti-Catholic conspiracy theory about how the Papacy is the Antichrist, labeled the Catholic Jesus as Osiris-Dionysus (and ultimately linking it back to a supposed idea started by "Nimrod and his mother Semiramis", note that Nimrod, if he existed, lived centuries before Semiramis).  He also stated that Mary was Isis, and also Ishtar and Inanna and Astarte.

While it is well known that a lot of Marian devotion comes from Isian devotion, and the image of the Theotokos with Jesus is based on statues of Isis nursing the baby Horus, is it possible that there is a feminine analogue to Osiris-Dionysus, an Isis-Demeter.  Was Hislop ri... oh screw that, Hislop was as correct as saying that Jesus was actually an alien, or an alien-hybrid.

In Book XI of The Golden Ass, the character of Lucius, still in the form of a donkey, bathes himself in the sea and prays for salvation and the restoration of his human form.  He then sleeps and wakes to find a Goddess in front of him.  The Goddess, Isis the Queen of Heaven, sates this:

...for the Phrygians call me Pessinuntica, the mother of the Gods: the Athenians call me Cecropian Artemis: the Cyprians, Paphian Aphrodite: the Candians, Dictyanna: the Sicilians , Stygian Proserpine: and the Eleusians call me Mother of the Corn. Some call me Juno, others Bellona of the Battles, and still others Hecate. Principally the Ethiopians which dwell in the Orient, and the Egyptians which are excellent in all kind of ancient doctrine, and by their proper ceremonies accustomed to worship me, do call me Queen Isis.

So Isis was considered a Goddess known by many names in many regions.  This was partially due to the major mytheme of the West, of the dying-rising God; and partially due to the popularity of the Goddess in the Ancient World.  People loved Isis, they also loved Demeter, and both were Goddesses that supported the poor and the downtrodden, and both promised a good afterlife.  Isis was also equated with deities that were associated with the stories of ressurection, like Hecate and Diana (Diana/Artemis, for those who do not know, was said to have sent the boar that killed Adonis, the dying-rising God associated with Venus/Aphrodite).

One thing that Hislop actually kind of got right was that this tradition continued on with the Virgin Mary.  Mary assumed a lot of the titles and ways of devotion that was given to this previous group of deities that I call Isis-Demeter.  Marry was associated with Goddess like Quan Yin in China (some even think Quan Yin was inspired by Mary, or even Isis, to form a feminine form of Avalokiteshvara), Tonantzin (which was more of a title than a deity), and the like.  Now, this doesn't mean in the least bit that Catholic and such are Goddess-Worshipers in the least bit, they worship Mary like a Buddhist worships the Buddha, meaning that they don't at all (instead, the term is veneration, especially in Christianity, where worship is saved for God alone).  However, many modern Pagans and Goddess-Worshipers (I do differentiate between the two, not all Goddess-Worshipers are Pagans) do worship Mary as a Goddess.

The Goddess of Wicca, and of many Wiccan-Influenced Neopagans, can be considered a modern form of Isis-Demeter.  In fact, I mentioned earlier in my posts for Pagan Blog Project that Babalon is a modern day Ishtar, whom can also be included in Isis-Demeter.  One of the central Wiccan stories is the Descent of the Goddess, in which after the death of the God, the Goddess descends into the underworld and encounters the Lord of Death, with whom she shares her mysteries, and discovers that he is the God, but in a new form.

Now what does this mean for modern Pagan Theology (or Thealogy, depending on if you view Theology and Thealogy as separate fields)?  Well, first ofall, let it be noted that I am writing this from my own standpoint in Traditional Neopaganism, neither Eclectic Pagan/New Age nor from a Pagan Reconstructionist stand-point.  With that out of the way, we can see that not only do we have the continuity of an archetype, that of the central mytheme of Western Civilization and the Mysteries, but also a return of the Goddess to that story.  In the myth of Christ, Mary only plays the role of mother and one of the first to discover the risen Christ.  While she plays the role of Mediatrix and Co-Redemtrix (depending on who you ask) in tradition, in the story, she has a very minor role.  Compare this to the Mysteries of the Ancient world, and the modern Pagan traditions influenced by Wicca, where her central role is restored.  Not only do we see this continuity of the archetype, but a sort of process change as well.  The Gods do not exist in a vacuum, they change with the times.  This is Process Theology in some regards.  Here the relationship between us, the world, and the Gods is focused on becoming rather than being, and that God does change.  Not only have the Gods changed, but in some ways, so has the mythos.  This works in relationship to the idea that, to the Pagan, we don't hold our myths to be fundamental truths, but mystical and philosophical guideposts on how to live our lives.

What is most important about Isis-Demeter is that, much like Osiris-Dionysus, the persistence of the Goddess/archetype through history proves that it is very dear to us, and that the changing of the seasons and our own selves is still as important as it was long ago.  The restoration of importance to Isis-Demeter and the role of the feminine in the Ressurection Myth has come at a time where we have felt ourselves throw nature out of whack, and lose our sense of morality in the universe.  By morality I do not mean the Divine Command Theory loved by those who bemoan the fact that people have lost their moral compass, I mean it like it is thought of by the Freemasons, where morality and ethics are "what make good men better."

We cannot have an Orisis-Dionysus without Isis-Demeter.  The Myth of Adonis is incomplete without Aphrodite/Venus, and there can be no Tammuz without Ishtar, much like how even the story of Jesus would be sorely lacking without Mary to suffer alongside him.  The Triple Goddess of many Neopagans including Wiccans would not be without her.  I end with part of a Mormon Hymn.  I know, Mormons aren't exactly known for their glowing view of women, with their Goddess being a hidden figure and excommunication awaiting those who try to worship her, but this famous quatrain from "O My Father" describes how both are necessary:

In the heavens are parents single?
No, the thought makes reason stare.
Truth is reason: truth eternal
Tells me I've a mother there.

Spring Cleaning

Its time to muse, and to talk about my day (read: my day yesterday, I fell asleep writing this post).

I have a somewhat on-again-off-again social life.  One one hand, I am some sort of Western Hikikomori that is occasionally riddled with social anxiety.  Other days I am this busy social butterfly who goes out and does some pretty amazing things.  This is a story about the latter.

So my D&D group got together today to clean out the basement Nerd Room/Work Shop of the group member who owns the house we play in.  It was all necessary upkeep, sweeping and stuff, plus I got some scrap metal out of it, and two Atari 2600's that I can sell.  The group regaled in stories of previous campaigns and adventures, and we feasted upon pizza, garlic knots, and buffalo wings; a feast of champions.

I feel like today not only was a spring cleaning of the Nerd Room, but also of the mind, refining ideas for my campaign setting, and bouncing ideas off of each other.  I gave to the current DM of the group a sort of very basic version of Wintermoot Island, which he loved (mainly just the Ice Giant Jarldom that has seen better days).  The discussion also had me clean up some of the major adventuring ideas (like my Rukarazyll encounter that I have eventually planned), and came up with new ones, as well as discarding old ones.  Sometimes a good mental cleaning and inventory is necessary.

Spring cleaning also lead to me meditating for a short while on my income.  I am still looking for a job, and am really trying to find a job within Sociology, since I have a degree in it.  Some say that Sociology and the Social Sciences in general are junk degrees, but I personally believe that it is only a junk degree if you don't go forth and use it.  Besides, I'm more worried about finding a fulfilling job, not a high-paying one.  But still, sometimes its a crapshoot trying to find a job in your field, especially in a not-so-populated area.  Hopefully, I will find something soon.

With spring cleaning and job hunting, I have also reflected on what is important in life.  Good times with friends and innovative ideas.  Seeing the House-Owner's home-made chess set was an inspiration for one source of income I know is coming.  Destiny and I talked once about Etsy accounts, something that I wonder if I could make happen.  It also made me think of not only my campaign settings, but also of a Fantasy RPG board game that I had floating around in my head.  Future plans for future times, but for now, good to plan.

The chess-set of awesome

So the night ended and I drove home with scrap metal, two Ataris, some new ideas, and a good reminder on the importance of having a job.  Pretty productive, not bad for a day of cleaning and loafing around :).

D&D Origin Month IV: The Paladin and the Squirrel

So we now get to my High School years.

And since a picture is worth a thousand words, I shall leave the description of my experiences like that.  Okay, it wasn't THAT bad all the time.  Some days had good things happen; some, nothing bad ever happened at all.  These were interesting times.

It was also around this time I finally began playing D&D in a group setting, and that lead to me wanting to make a character.  But what kind of character should I play?  Well the groups usually already had a fighter and a cleric and such, and I didn't fully understand my nuances for playing non-combat characters, and so the Paladin seemed to be a perfect choice.  He's a cleric/fighter mix who also was similar to my worldview at the time.  While I had left Evangelicalism behind, some of the morality lingered on: a deep sense of morality and law-abidingness, but in a more Deistic sense.  The Paladin seemed perfect for me.  And so Cole was born.

The above image in a sense reflected my vision of Cole.  Cole is a wibbly-wobbly etymology (read: probably not accurate in the least bit) of my own name.  He fought valiantly for Heironeous, the God of Valor, and defended the weak.  He stood for truth, justice and the American Campaign Setting Way.  He was also, to simply state it, Lawful Stupid.  He also fit the stereotype of the celibate holy knight.  He would save fair maidens and princess and slay all evil including even the common thief stealing a turnip.  He was, quite simply, an asshole.  This partially had to do with my inability to understand the finer points of Alignments, and also a bit of exploring my own morality.  Problem was, as soon as I was done exploring my morality, playing Paladins (until Amadeus), was quite pointless, I no longer saw myself as Lawful Good, but as Neutral Good, and that started to show.  Suddenly, Cole the Paladin started to exhibit signs of slacking off on the job

My personal worldview change from Lawful Good to Neutral Good was in some ways major.  It was a freeing of my own mind and thoughts from the previous weltanschauung and towards where I am today (I still consider myself Neutral Good).  Gone was the idea of an imposed morality and entered the philosophical ethics that followed a more natural feel for me, based on Virtue and a personal code of conduct.

Suddenly, you feel the presence of the man known as Charlemagne enter

the chamber.  The ghost then speaks, "eh, guess that does make him a

paladin in my book.... I guess...."

So then where does the squirrel enter?  Well, the DM at the time, whom I kind of looked up to as an older brother in a sense, decided to just randomly give my Paladin a squirrel, a squirrel that my Paladin defended to the last.  It was link Minsk and Boo, except there was no chance Cole would think it was a miniature Giant Space Squirrel.  While it was more of a plot device that followed me around, it kind of morphed into a sort of animal companion.  Cole would go to the extreme of even having his Alignment change to defend the squirrel, and thus ended my playing of Paladins until Amadeus.

So where do I stand on Paladins in my setting?  Well, it has certainly evolved, if you read back on some of my Table Stories and such.  Amadeus is not the stereotypical maiden-saving, dragon-slaying, rent-paying Paladin.  None of the Paladin Groups in my settings are like that either, well, except for one group or two, but in general, they were more like the Night's Watch of Game of Thrones, except some could take wives, hold lands, and father children.  Also, Paladins do play a somewhat larger role than in other settings, due to there probably being more in mine due to not having to be celibate Jerry Falwels wielding broadswords.

But with Paladin-hood out of the question, a new hero emerged, and a legend born (play appropriate theme music here).

Next week, the Final Chapter

D&D Origin Month Part III: D&D Adventure Game (Starter Set for 3E)

Before I begin this post, I want to say a few things.  We all have been rocked and shocked by the disaster yesterday at the Boston Marathon.  It is part of the reason why this post comes today rather than yesterday. I just want to state a special message of thanks to all EMS, Fire, Police, National Guard, et cetera that helped save as many lives as possible.  I personally know how rough a job that is, being on an Emergency Squad myself.  If you are a reader in the Boston area, I also want to give you a hug over the internet.May the Gods watch over and comfort you all.

And now, our regularly scheduled blog-post

Where we last left off, I was in a Waldenbooks store, in which I found a product related to Dungeons and Dragons.  Since I, at the time, enjoyed Eye of the Beholder, I picked up the product and brought it home.  And there, in the silence of my room, I opened the product and read through every book held within.  Sure, it wasn't long reading, but it gave me an idea on where the rules came from for the video game, and also made me want to play the game so bad.  The game came with pre-made characters, since rules for character creation came with the Player's Handbook (which I didn't buy).  The game also came with tokens for monsters and such and a map filled with rooms.  With the three booklets, one had the pre-made characters, one had the rules, and one was filled with adventures.  I remember cutting up the map so I could custom make my own dungeons and such.  I know, slaughtering the resale value, but I would never sell such memories.

The very first dungeon was very, very basic.  A unicorn that healed travelers in this one forest and generally kept things safe was kidnapped by goblins, and then adventurers were hired to save the day.  The dungeon was only two rooms, the sleeping quarters of the goblins, and the prison for the unicorn.  The adventure mainly served to introduce new players to combat and skill checks.  This adventure also introduced me to the difficulty of being both the DM and the PCs.  It's like playing badminton and tennis at the same time!

And now that I spent two brief paragraphs on the Adventure Game (since I cannot find the kickass quote on the back of the box, beyond remembering the first sentence being something like "There is something moving behind that door..."), I shall now completely ignore it until the end to talk about the official core books... erm... the two-of-three core books that I did get.  I bought the Players Handbook and the Monster Manual. I did not get the Dungeon Master's Guide.  That's like getting a BLT without the T (although, I would order a BLT without the T, not the hugest fan of raw tomatoes; so a BLP without the P?).  However, with the extension of the rules, and more monsters than I could wave a stick at, I was a nerd in Heaven.  I was also an oxymoron in some regards; an Evangelical playing a game that many Evangelicals consider the work of Satan, but let's not delve to deeply into that mess.  With the expanded rules, I began writing my own adventures.  Sure, they were basic and bland as fuck, but they were still exponentially better than Twilight.

However, if Twilight was all about this guy, I would be the biggest Twihard

on the planet.  Charlie: Vampire Hunter.  Instead, we got Bella and Edward...

I looked forward to the times when I would have some change in my wallet.  I would walk past the video game stoes right into Waldenbooks to buy up all the supplement books for D&D (and yet it never occured to me to buy the DMG).  Dungeons and Dragons also revived my interest in reading, leading me to read the Lord of the Rings, the Dragonlance Chronicles, and the like.  These books fed back into my imagination which lead me to buy more supplement books which would make me interested to read, which would continue this cycle that made me three things: imaginative, well rounded, and dirt poor.  It isn't too much of a stretch to say that, in a way, purchasing the D&D Adventure Game saved my life.

The D&D Adventure Game gave me a place to go to when the outside world made me sad and weary.  The adventures gave me a way to fulfill my wonderlust, and gave me a way to experience catharsis over the roughest things.  Yes, Dungeons and Dragons saved my life.

Now, being from a rural town, I didn't really have anyone to play with, then High School happened.

And a fateful question would be asked....

Pagan Blog Project: Handfasting

Since next week I will be heading down to see Destiny again (I'm so excited), I figured that I should do my PBP post now while its fresh on my mind.  Let's see......

*After five minutes of checking the list and thinking*

Well, I would have liked to have done more research before doing Hermes Trismegistus, and my last few have been a little heady.  Okay sure, Forge Ahead was somewhat opinion based, but it was more of a State of the Union Address kind of opinion, very heady indeed.  Let's go for something with more feeling.  How about we talk about handfastings?  But not about the history or a glance at the ritual, let's talk about more things that have to do with feelings *puts on thoughtful specs*

I was an odd child growing up.  Much like a lot of girls I knew, I dreamed of a wedding (I grew up in Fiftiesland).  I mean, I didn't put too much stock into it, just a few ideas that I liked and wanted.  As I grew I moved into and out of phases of thinking about it to not thinking about it.  Interestingly enough, the happier I was the more I gave thought to it, maybe it has to do with the oxytocin, I don't know.  I haven't given it some thought since I was around 17, and again around 20, but I recently meditated on the idea again, wondering what I would like, and it wasn't because I recently reblogged a photo set of a Doctor Who themed wedding.

So what would I want for my handfasting?  Well, I can picture it being in the great outdoors on a nice decently temperatured day, maybe sometime in late summer or early fall.  I could see it done in the shade of a tree or something, with things hanging off the tree, ribbons and windchimes more than likely.  There will be chairs, I'm not going to have people stand around in a circle and such, so chairs are go go go.  People got bad backs and shit.  I would want light and celebratory music, nothing grand, so wind-instruments and string instruments as long as its not overly fancy.  And I want a wedding altar incorporating a Roman design, like those plaster columns you can buy at like Michael's or Hobby Lobby, except done up nice, maybe two of them, with a sort of platform resting on them.

Something like this.

In fact, I wouldn't mind some more Columns, reminiscient of a Roman Ruin of sorts.  Could always have the handfasting in Europe, but that might cost too much money for some to fly out and have a hotel just to watch a wedding in a ruin.  Then again, I love the romantic feel of some Roman ruins like that, its like you can still feel the people there, worshiping, playing, living, and breathing.  The ceremony won't be a complex fair, I feel like to much ritual and ceremony actually would detract from the beauty of a handfasting itself.  I would rather the incense be the wonderful late summer air and such.  To mutate my Charlemagne: "let my wedding chapel be the rocks and the trees, and the birds in the sky."

Charlemagne: Wait, that wasn't me, that was all Connery!

And what's this about Pagan rituals?  I thought I ended them!

*drops mic, storms off stage ranting*

So that is how I imagine my handfasting, if I ever have one.  something simple, yet romantic.  I think that's the most important thing for a handfasting to be, romantic.  I feel like the best way for the romance to come is to just let it come naturally, don't force it, or try to make it conform to some sort of David Tutera dream wedding (though, from what I know, the guy works miracles).  So let me end it by wishing that, if you are reading this and are planning a handfasting, may your union be fruitful and happy, and don't ask me to plan it either, you might get a Doctor Who themed wedding.

A Random Mope

I have such amazing plans for today.  Printing out job applications so I can get a job and make some money, maybe enjoy nature fresh from a good rain-storm, perhaps watch some X-Files and finally finish up my replay of Grandia.  Its beautiful out, my room feels comfy, not muggy or like an icebox, and in eight days I get to go and see Destiny again, and three days till I play D&D.  And speaking of Destiny, I'm staying at her dorm for three days, I get to spend time with this amazing woman for three days.

So I log on to my laptop to put the applications on my thumb-drive, and then this little random thought floats through my head: "Why do I feel so ugly?"

POOF!  Here I am now, such wonderful plans, and having a mope.  I mean, I recovered quite quickly, don't get me wrong, but damn!  I'll be at the library, print-outs will end up costing more than I thought, everything will be slushy so I can't enjoy nature all too much, and my room will end up feeling like the Amazon during the rainy period.

I just have to keep myself focused on the positive.  I have to remember that these applications can lead to jobs, that nature still looks beautiful after a heavy rain, no mater how much the ground would like to do a quicksand impersonation, and no matter how muggy my room gets, it always feels amazing and cool at night when I sleep.

So, question to any of my readers who are feeling brave.  What do you do to keep positive?  What gets you through the mopey moments of life?  I keep focused on the future and remember the flip-side of every bad thing.

The way I see it, life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don’t always soften the bad things, but vice versa the bad things don’t always spoil the good things and make them unimportant. And we definitely added to his pile of good things.

The Doctor - Episode: Vincent and the Doctor

Hopefully today will be another thing on your pile of good things.

D&D Origin Month Part II: Eye of the Beholder

In the last entry I discussed playing Warriors of the Eternal Sun, not knowing that it was my introduction to Dungeons & Dragons, despite me not knowing what Dungeons & Dragons was.  All I knew was that Warriors of the Eternal sun was different from the other two RPGs that I played.  It required a lot more tactical thinking and resource management.  A few years would pass, and I would enter into one of the darker moments of my life, stretching from 7th Grade all the way through High School.  Yes, this mope is necessary to the story.

Things change when you enter Middle School and such.  Suddenly, people care, and care a lot, about: their appearance, taste in the "right" music, being seen with the "right" people, etc.  I found myself an outcast.  In this loneliness coccoon, I turned to anything to make me feel alright.  This is not an anti-drug story, in fact, seeing how things turned out, this is an anti-fundamentalist-religion story.  Yes, I became, for about a year and a half, an Evangelical Christian.  I watched TBN religiously, went to Christian websites, and was all-in-all Rapture ready.  Never tried to convert anybody, partially out of social anxiety, partially out of the fact that, deep down, I really didn't believe in it all too much.  Too much of it conflicted with my inner nature, they said that things were evil that not only did I disagree with them on it, I discovered I was that.  A self-hating bisexual does not a very merry Middle School experience make.  However, it would take Da Vinci Code, Final Fantasy VII, and the suicide of a close friend in the UK to lay my Evangelism to rest in Freshman year and turn it into a sort of live-and-let-live Deism (until becoming Pagan at 17), but I digress.

During this time, I read quite a bit and played a lot of RPGs (no wonder I wasn't an Evangelical deep down :P), and one game that I came to again and again was Cadash.  Now I already explained a bit about Cadash in the previous post, so I won't go back into it.  What I will say is that in the Caves that were home to the Kraken, there were these tree/root monsters with one eye that shot fireballs at you.  Something about that specific monster always stayed with me.  So I'm walking around Target and go to the video game section, and imagine to my surprise on a GBA game, what I mistaken for that tree/root monster.  So I scoop up the game, bring it home and played it.  By this time, I played Final Fantasy Tactics, so I knew a bit more about grid-based tactical battle.  I played the shit out of this game, and when I beat it, I wanted to know more about this world.  "What is this city of Waterdeep?  I've never heard of Half-Elves before?  So that one-eyed monster was nothing like those tree/root guys from Cadash."

Behold then, the internet.  At the time, we had a Windows 98 that was virus ridden because, like any teenage boy, I needed to see titties that bad.  This was also back in the day logging onto the internet made a bunch of scratchy dialing noises and took out your phone line.  Dial-up everyone, annoying and slow, but it worked.  I found out that Eye of the Beholder was a story that took place in the world of the Forgotten Realms, and thats when I was finally introduced to Dungeons and Dragons.  I also could have looked at the box which said D&D on it, but I was young, I didn't waste any time on boxes and manuals!

The plot of Eye of the Beholder?  Wikipedia says it better than I could:

The lords of the city of Waterdeep hire a team of adventurers to investigate an evil coming from beneath the city. The adventurers enter the city's sewer, but the entrance gets blocked by a collapse caused by Xanathar, the eponymous beholder. The team descends further beneath the city, going through Dwarf and Drow clans, to Xanathar's lair, where the final confrontation takes place.

This game was also my first introduction to Drow, even though they were in Warriors of the Eternal Sun (Dark Elves in Mystara).  Ironically, despite being impressed with the Drow, I rarely use them in campaigns.

Also, despite being the game that had me learn about D&D officially, it never had much of an impact on how I make settings or encounters.  The game, looking back, was very good at being a dungeon crawl, and giving me a taste of what D&D is like, but its definitely a lackluster title.  In fact, as blasphemous as it is to some gamers, I really am not the hugest fan of Forgotten Realms.  My main two settings in D&D are Mystara and Eberron, and they reflect in my settings.  I think the only major effect it has had is the use of Beholders, as well as the pacing towards the Big-Bad.  I will discuss this more in the next Table Plan in May.

But this game set me off on a journey unlike any other.  From here I would walk one day into a Waldenbooks store (again, back when dinosaurs roamed the Earth), and make a life-changing purchase.

Klaatu Barada Nik*cough*

There is an Army of Darkness RPG...

If I had more money in my pockets, I would be so there!

Funny enough, writing this at like 1 AM, in the morning, not too long ago I was talking to my sister about how much of a shame it is that I haven't seen this movie in such a long time.  Now, not only do I need to find the movie, I need to get this game.  If I do fork out the money to buy it, hopefully I don't have to recite some magic charm before picking it up, I might not say the words exactly like I was told, leading to the Lehigh Valley being overrun with the undead.  Let's just hope the Clerics are up to the challenge, just in case.

But I'm ready, I'm ready to play this game and to kick zombie ass!

Are all men from the Lehigh Valley loudmouth braggarts?  Nope.  Just me baby, just me.

PBP: Gemistus Pletho

Neopaganism is generally a new movement, grown from the weakening of the Church's power in temporal matters during the Enlightment.  But, what if I was to tell you that there were Neopagans in Europe during dangerous times to be even non-Catholic or non-Orthodox, Neopagans whom not old believed in and worshiped the Old Gods, but also was an advocate of Polytheism and even possibly built a Temple in their honor?  There was such a brave man, who faced the odds, reintroduced Plato's writings and Hermetic texts to Europe, attempted to fix the Great Schism between the Catholic and Orthodox Churches, and called people back to the worship of the Gods of Greece and Rome.  His name, was Gemistus Pletho

Pletho, originally called Georgius Gemistus, was born around 1355, and was an avid student of philosophy in the Byzantine Empire.  He studied in Adrianopolis during the time of its take-over by Sultan Murad I when he was just ten years old.  He took his name of Plethon from Plato himself, since he was inspired by his works.  Many considered the man to be the second Plato.  I'm sure we might think of him as a possible reincarnation of Plato.  Cardinal Bessarion certainly thought so, and he was Catholic.

Pletho was confined in Mistra by the Emperor of the Byzantine Empire for heresy against the Church, but developed such a following that the penultimate emperor, John VIII, consulted him on the unification of both the Catholic and Orthodox churches.  During this time, he began a philosophical debate that burns even to this day: who's teachings should we follow more: Aristotle or Plato?  He also influenced the likes of Cosimo de'Medici and Marsilio Ficino, and is ultimately the father of the Renaissance.

I worshiped the Old Gods before it was cool.

What makes this Renaissance man a Pagan, besides the accusations?  Pletho wrote two books that unfortunately no longer exist but in fragments thanks to Patriarch Gennadius II, the Summary and the Nomoi.  In both, Pletho called for a return to the worship of the Olympians and to the use of Neoplatonic Theurgy.  This worship also called on the person to use logic and reason instead of faith.  Humans are related to the Gods, and thus should strive to Virtue and Goodness to be like the Gods, doing so over many lifetimes through reincarnation.  The Universe was neither created nor could it be destroyed, and was perfect and not fallen or evil.  The three greates of the Gods were Zeus, Poseidon, and Hera, who ruled over the World.  While there were section detailing his thoughts on society and government, the meat of it was an advocacy for Neopaganism.

Pletho would return to Mistra and begin a Mystery School in which he instructed his students into proper worship of the Gods.  Pletho died around 1452, almost living to be 100 years old.  In 1464 his remains were moved to the Tempio Malatestiano in Rimini, Italy.  This church, dedicated to St, Francis of Assisi, was considered to be an exaltation of paganism, and Pope Pius II said it was, "full of pagan gods and profane things."  The people who moved Pletho's body wanted him to be buried among free men.

The Tempio Malatestiano

The Goddess of Awesome Did a Thing!

Hey guy, guess what?  This month is National Poetry Month.  Obviously I have just discovered this for the most part; just like how yesterday was that one day where people make practical jokes on each other.

Today started out like any other, I watch doctor who, do some chores around the house, and talk to Destiny.  Well, when she came home she made a video entry into Gabriel Gadfly's Poetry Matters movement.  No sooner she does this that not only is her video on Tumblr, Twitter, and Facebook, but now, on my blog as well.  I think her entry is amazing, and I'm sure you all have guessed how I feel about her, so here is her video:



I am so proud of her, and her involvement in Poetry Matters and Poetry Month.  I to, think that poetry matters.  I might not read a lot of it, and what I do write might not be the best, but I think poetry is beautiful and important.

In fact *puts on thoughtful specs and sits on a chair next to a fireplace* I shall post for you one of my own:

A Rhythmic Poem about Memories


On my darkest days
I look back
Take a breath
And pull out my box of wishes
My wish box includes
Ticket stubs
Token coins
And memories of hope and love
The light in my heart
Shines brighter
Burns longer
Because you are my true treasure
The box has more than
Ticket stubs
Token coins
It holds you and me together

D&D Origins: Warriors of the Eternal Sun

When I was a kid, we didn't have systems, like the XBox 360 or the Wii.  We had the grand-daddy of awesome systems, the SEGA Genesis.  It feels weird for me to say that, being the Nintendo Fanboy I am today, but when I was a kid, I had the ATARI 2500 and I had the Genesis.  Later I would have a Gameboy Color and the N64, but when I was a small boy, I had the Genesis.  Sonic the Hedgehog, Wonder Boy, Battle Tech.  Yeah!  SEGA does what Ninten-don't, and don't you fucking forget it!

Now that I am done sucking the magnificent cock of the Genesis, I must begin my story not with the game in the title, but with another game called Cadash.  Cadash was an adaptation of the arcade game by Taito, and was my first major introduction to fantasy gaming (i.e. wizards, dragons, etc.)  I beat the game as both the Fighter and the Wizard, and loved the game so much.  This will become very important later, but with this story, it led to how I borrowed a lot of my games from friends and relatives.  My cousins owned Cadash, and I borrowed it a lot.  When the family vet's son was moving out, he let me borrow a lot of his games.  There was Aladdin, and Terminator, all really great games.  One cart stood out in my memory.  This game was Warriors of the Eternal Sun.  Unbeknownst to me at the time, but this was my official introduction to Dungeons and Dragons.

Now, when I started playing this game, I had already started playing Pokemon and Dragon Warrior, so RPGs were nothing new to me.  What was new, however, was the customization.  Yeah, it was simplistic and based on AD&D rules (I started with 3e, so AD&D is a bit unfamiliar), but I loved it.  I made characters based on my friends, and explored the strange new lands the castle appeared in, and died, died A LOT.  Probably died more times than Kenny and Captain Jack combined, though if you add Rory to the mix, you might get close.  This game more than any other introduced me to tactical thinking and resource management.  Some say video games make people dumber.  I, on the other hand, grew smarter playing this game.

The plot was:  A castle in an unknown location in the world of Mystara sinks beneath the ground during a conflict with Goblins.  The king orders you to figure out what has happened, and to gain allies.  As you investigate the Valley of the Eternal Sun (since the sun never sets), you gain allies, but the populous of the town start going insane, driven to madness by a mysterious power.

I never did beat the game, I both had no clue what I was doing, and never had the game long enough for me to figure it out.  I mean, I needed a strategy guide to help me figure out parts of Dragon Warrior III, and I read that guide so much it literally doesn't exist anymore.  I got as far as the Azcans usually, and only once made it to the fiery tunnels that eventually take you to the Oltecs.  Despite never making it all THAT far, the game enchanted me so much, so much so that I still do not know why I haven't downloaded a ROM of it and played it.  The title screen music is even my ringtone.

I later revisited this game when making a campaign in high school.  I never did get the chance to DM that adventure, most of the people I played with graduated and moved on to bigger and better things.  The files I typed up for it are probably both lost on an old computer in this house and lurking away hidden in the harddrives of my alma mater, along with a hacked copy of DOOM and a list of proxies to bypass the school's firewall so you can check MySpace (back when dinosaurs roamed the Earth).  Perhaps a group of nerd will uncover it and play out a few adventures?  Hell, who am I kidding?  They probably will want to play DOOM, I know I wanted to!  I want to play some DOOM now, to be fairly honest.

However, I would not realize what Dungeons and Dragons was until I saw a game that felt more like traditional D&D, and boy was that game beautiful.  But, as they always say, "beauty is in the eye of the beholder."