Fish Story: or how modern Media over exagerates for viewcount

I am not the one to tempt fate, nor am I one to constantly dote over something bad.  After all, shuo Cao Cao, Cao cao jiu dao (speak of Cao Cao, and Cao Cao arrives).  I'm also a realist, I know when things can get bad, and how to prepare for it to be safe.  I am neither a survivalist or a "what could go wrong" kind of guy.  That is why I view Hurricane Sandy as what it is, a hurricane, a simple force of nature.  A powerful one, but nature none the less.  It is not the end of the world, it is not the wrath of God, it is not a freak accident.  Or, as I remember the joke going, call Pluto a meteor and it will start acting like one.  Make Sandy into the apocalypse, and it will be the apocalypse!

But Kyle, you may be saying, how does this work back to the modern Media.  We must remember that the Media is a very powerful force, it makes or breaks the opinions of millions.

I feel an image-based running gag beginning, but then again, this was an awesome movie

I would leave it with that, but I don't want to me misconstrued as some sort of conspiracy theorist watching Alex Jones like he's going out of style and jacking it like a fiend to Soldier of Fortune.  First of all, I find Alex Jones to be a prick and a bastard milking the paranoid for all they are worth, and is in my mind, the real life Elliot Carver in some ways.  What does that have to do with the Media, well, not much, but he is a good example of what I mean.  Plus, any excuse to slam on Alex Jones makes it a good day ;).

Second of all, criticizing the Media for what amounts to "I have all the answers, watch me," does not a conspiracy theorist make.  Guys, I'm not some sort of savant or guru, in fact, it could also be said that I to engage in such a ploy at times.  Its only human nature.  However, with logic and common sense, you can easily see beyond it.

So, when I see the over hyping and the "imagined version" of the hurricane being passed off as some sort of unquestioned holy writ, of course I will get a little skeptical.  Now, if I lived closer to the shore, I would probably be worried, but I'm up in the mountains.  I don't think the Biblical Flood is happening again any time soon to sweep us all away.  As a Pagan, I would look at that and just be like "well fuck..." and just accept my fate like a boss.  But as long as you don't do anything fool-hardy and be prepared for it, then you should be okay, whatever the Media tells you.

How the Media has made this hurricane look at times.

So what lesson can we take from this blog post today?  Well, I think the main lesson is that we should take the stories we hear with a grain of salt.  Especially true in America, a lot of our media is based on how to get  higher view-counts/ratings.  If we can get beyond that, then we can get to the actual news.  We also should remember that the forces of nature are just that, forces of nature.  If we accept that, then everything should be fine if we are prepared.

I will admit though, I had plans on going to a Samhain ritual/party in Philly.  ANd now all I can think about is the storm saying in Danny DeVito's voice, "I don't think so."

Belated Comic-Con Experience Blog

I do realize that it has almost been a week and I have yet to post news about my New York Comic-Con experience.  I know I never said that there would be a blog about it, but generally it could be assumed that there would be.  So here it is, for you to read!

But first, a theme for my trip!

The morning bus ride was interesting enough, the bus was full and my friends and I were scattered around the bus taking up the seats left over.  It's kind of awkward, sure, but it beat waiting around for the next bus.  Things wouldn't get awkward again until we got into an accident right before the Lincoln Tunnel.  I guess driving incompetency is everywhere.  Besides that, our trip there was rather uneventful, just wished that I brought like my iPod or my DS so I had something to occupy myself with.  Then again, it's New York City, and we know what they do to people who are occupying.

So we get into the Javits Center, waited in line, I got into my costume as the Tenth Doctor, and went on in.  One thing that immediately amazes you is just the immensity of the place.  This was not the small Anime Festival I went to three years prior.  Damn, I mean this simple center became the Mecca for all things nerdy, and it was glorious!  Not just Anime, but also Gaming (both video and table-top), Comics, Steampunk, Zombies...

And let's not for get Doctor Who! (Yes, that's yours truly BTW)

 

One thing I was realy looking forward to was meeting Peter Davison, who played the Fifth Doctor from 1982-1984 taking on the role after Tom Baker.  I will admit, I haven't seen a whole lot of the old series, mainly trying to find it online since money is a bit tight right now, but what I have seen I really liked.  I really did like the introduction of the Fifth Doctor in Castrovalva (and the guy in front of me in the autograph line actually brought the DVD to be autographed).  Right before meeting Peter Davison, I hit up the Doctor Who booth, getting the above picture taken by a girl I believe was dressed as Princess Zelda, and getting a print of the Dalek/Ironside "To Victory" poster.

 

I think one of the most unexpected finds, besides Dystopia Rising, was the announcement of an HD remake of Okami.  I loved Okami, and I have yet to play Okamiden.  Then again, I love games that let you explore and take in the world around you.  This would explain my love for Zelda-esque adventures, Metroidvanias, RPGs in general; as well as why I fail miserably in games like Call of Duty.

 

How I picture myself in Call of Duty (second reference to this episode of Archer... damn lol)

 

I once wrote an essay on the sort of metaphysical nature of such huge gathering of niche communities, and how they take the form of a sort of civil religion.  I know people who have their who year revolve around Comic-Con like how the Jewish culture has new year on Rosh Hashana or the Neopagan Samhain (more on Samhain soon BTW).  I certainly do feel this presence while at Comic-Con.  Free Hugs, more than just a physical embrace, can also represent the sort of emotion hug one gets upon entering.  Here the nerd is welcomed, and is at home.  It is not every day we get to let our freak flags fly and get down and nerdy.

The ride home was rather uneventful, and a late dinner at a local diner back in my hometown of Phillipsburg signaled the end of that wonderful day.  Soon pictures would be posted, gifts given, and blog posted; yet I still think back to that day.  When the introvert that I am can just let his guard down for twenty-four hours, and just be himself.

It's been eight days since the "New Year," and so far, year 1 is looking like a pretty good year ;)

The Most Annoying Sound in the World

I love EMS work, I really do.  I'm even training to become an EMT, and am interested in doing it professionally.  I really love helping people and caring for them until the doctor takes a whack at it.  But there are some times, like: trying to sleep at 3 in the morning, intimate romantic and/or sexual conversations with your partner, about to finally beat Baramos in DWIII on your own (I never did), eating a feast, even during a wedding; when the pager kind of sounds like this...

D&D Stories: The Fearless Dragon Slayers #1

Man, this session reminds me of a gamer's bit of blind faith in luck and what many jokingly called the "Random Number God."  All our rolls started out so crappy, like, hilariously crappy.  So, some establishing knowledge:

After raiding a ruined desert treasury for a Dwarven army, we encountered a Sphinx who have us a quest to seal an Efreeti inside of a lamp.  After walking through a magic door, we saw the destruction said Efreeti had caused, burning down small desert towns.  We managed to seal the Efreeti, and guide the displaced villagers to a nearby village.

And then, Ollie, our cleric of Olidammara, is commanded by his God to steal a precious golden urn from the town's temple to Pelor, God of the Sun...

Let me get the music started for you... Iiiiiits Bad Wolf Company's Flyyyyying Circus!

So Lazlo and Ollie head off to the temple of Pelor, but not before Lazlo meets a beautiful young maiden who immediately glomps him and becomes attached.  So anyway, Ollie and Lazlo head to the temple, and while Ollie used his knowledge of religion to convince the priests to come upstairs for discussions on an addition, I planned the heist of the urn.  The plan: with my insane bonuses to Bluff and Diplomacy, I could intentionally drop the urn, challenge an imaginary thief, and take the urn for fixing in the city of Kormine (which I did know a guy there who could, so that wasn't a lie).  And so we roll our Bluff and Sense Motive checks.

Bluff..... 2!!!!!! A fucking two.
Sense Motive...... 19!!!!! Not even my bonuses could beat their check.  Now granted, all they knew was that I was lying about the thief, the wild accusations they lept to.  So a huge commotion involving all the priests in the temple and the town guard and a Zone of Truth (which I handled pretty well, so much for lies of omission being lies none-the-less), I got out with only a measly fineand banishment.  Like we would ever visit this place again, ya know?  And I got my revenge, I convinced enough people in the town that there was a free feast at this temple, a temple that was small and poor.

Worked out well for Ollie, and the short fuse of Vargus the Barbarian Mountain Dwarf helped things along.  Ollie used the commotion to cast three spells: Obscuring Mist, Invisibility on the urn, and Disguise Self on himself to look like a Priest.  Yeah, we needed to escape.  And so we did, back to the magic door and into the Sphinx's domain.  Lazlo stayed outside the chamber with Jess the Maiden, who convinces Lazlo that it is a good idea to become a couple (a Will save I fail miserably by the way).  However, we got a nice set of treasure, including an Ioun Stone that makes the user not need to eat or drink (of course given to the one who has a ring that does the same thing), and a Robe of Useful Items for me.

So now we wondered where to go.  We wanted to get far away from this desert.  So Jess the Maiden suggested the city of Kormine, where they are building a huge tower that, as we guessed, could be trouble with the war between the Dwarves and Humans brewing (and us questioning the DM if he played Fable or Shin Megami Tensei).  Upon reaching Kormine, it was hard to miss said tower, and the HUGE FUCKING AIRSHIP DOCKED THERE!  This was not looking like a good situation for anybody involved, not at all.

And then Jess convinces Lazlo to have sex every night... (a check I also fail miserably).  I think we know what Jess is by now, if not, then maybe the clue that I felt weakened, drain, and like shit in the morning (aka Level Drain) might clue you in.  Despite the drain, my investigation of the tower was very fruitful.  While Ollie and Vargus investigated the thieves guild (and Krusk gets bored because of the lack of combat), Lazlo investigates the airship as a whole, and discovers a plan of using slave labor to commit genocide on nearby islands so the rich can build resorts.  Ethics, the Humans have none!

With a week to kill until the airship launches, we decided to take on some quests.  Our first was to slay some salamanders that were attacking nearby farmlands.  Before I continue, I must mention that, while in Kormine, I got my already +1 Rapier enchanted with Keen.  This came in handy during this fight, in which despite being the squishiest in the group, had what could be considered one of the greatest killstreaks in the game so far, mainly thanks to sneak attack.  Even Jess the Maiden comes in to help out, making us suspicious of what she really is (that and the DM threw us a small bone).

With this, the Bad Wolf Company was born!  And that totally wasn't a Doctor Who reference!

I mean, granted, we were a team every since the Red Dragon we fought in a volcano (in which I almost had to roll up a new character), but we had no name.  Hell, we didn't even name our horses, and we rode them through the desert.  At least it was good to get out of the rain, am I right?

And so we begin quest two, here, let me get the fitting music out...

Trust me, the zaniness of the Can Can is fitting!

Our second quest (and last one of the evening, due to a fight so long it makes Helms Deep look short), was to protect a sacred grove from defilers.  Vargus couldn't help but laugh at the Elven worship of trees, which made our employer less than amused with us.  Upon getting to the grove, we encounter a Nymph who guarded the grove, who feared the Satyrs amassing nearby (as well as worrying about the Salamanders, it's not like Elemental Gates need to be opened by Wizards or anything right?  Right?), and feared for her safety.  I mean, Satyrs are known for raping Nymphs.

What we didn't realize, besides how bad my Negative Levels would affect me, was that Satyrs have music, which can have magical affects on their opponents, like sleep, or making the bravest of our party (aka, Krusk) run faster than an Olympic athlete.  We also didn't account for the affects Confusion and Sound Burst can have, as well as that unless its energy or cold iron, Satyrs have Damage Reduction.  So much for an easy battle against a party of Satyrs!

So after being asleep for like five rounds, someone wakes me up (Jess, gotta keep the livestock safe ya know), and I proceed to show my gratitude for the lovely music by throwing powdered glass into the eyes of the chief of the Satyrs (thanks to the Spoony One for that tidbit).  The DM fudged rolls in our favor just so this battle could end.  I obtained the killing blow on the last Satyr with my +1 Shock Hand Crossbow, with a James Bondish one-liner to boot.

"Don't mess with a bastard, you will be bolting to death that way."

Though I wish I did something like this...

And that concluded this game session.  Oh, and by the way, for the thick, Jess is a Succubus. 

ADDENDUM: I want to apologize the constant shifting of referring to my character by his name (Lazlo), and with referring to myself in first-person.  I'll probably stick with first person for Lazlo for future updates.

D&D Stories and Table Plan

I have two new series to begin talking about on here.  Alternating weekly, are two gaming based posts.  The first is D&D Stories, the continuing sagas of the games I am playing in.  The second is Table Plan, which is a How-To guide to gaming and DM'ing.  While I use D&D related terms for these stories, I will also describe Pathfinder and other RPG's in these posts.

So consider this the launching day of these posts, posted every Monday!

I will begin by introducing the characters from the latest game:

Lazlo, a Human Rogue (played by me)
Ollie, a Halfling Cleric of Olidammara
Vargus, a Dwarf Barbarian
Krusk, a Half-Orc... I'll have to get back to you on the class
Noli, a Human Fighter

So far, we accepted a quest to slay a dragon (and won), thus gaining ourselves a reputation in the Dwarven Kingdom, and have undertaken a quest in the desert, involving a Lamia (and twenty in-game minutes of trying to find a little girl trapped under the sand, we didn't know about ventriloquism), a Sphinx, and a Djinni.  And my rogue, well this picture will tell you what kind of rogue I am playing...

The first D&D Stories: The Fearless Dragon Slayers will be posted next Monday!

And for Table Plan #1, How to Get Started Gaming?

Well, gaming is a fun social experience to get involved in.  People assume it's some nerdy past time where nerds can get together and live out Lord of the Rings, and yeah, that's generally it, but it's much more than that.  There is the chance to do the things we cannot normally do, and I don't mean the slaying of dragons or the raiding of long abandoned ruins taken over by Yuan-Ti.  No, I mean some of the deep comradery that is rare today unless you are in the military, or the time to plan out a journey (that in this world of the 9-5 plus reality TV after work, is also uncommon).  Gaming is fun, it's telling, and cathartic, and did I forget to mention fun?

So, you must first gather some friends.  While it does help to have someone who has experience gaming, experience is not necessary.  With modern technology today, you can also find a meet-up group, or find one through your local hobby/game store.  While it is possible to play a game by yourself (I've done it, and 4E D&D lays out suggestions if you are doing that), this game is meant to be played with others.  I mean, it can be boring to play by yourself (unless Redtube, but I digress).

Next, you need the Core Rulebooks, these are the books that have the rules and necessary fluff to play the game.  Some games, like Pathfinder, have most of their rules conveniently bundled into a single Core Rulebook.  Other games, like D&D, have DM material separated from the Player rules.  With 3.5, you can find SRD material on the internet, and through a simple Google search as well.  Praise the Open Gaming License, hallelujah, om namah shivaya, blessed be!

Finally, read the books and dive on in.  You can read the books cover to cover and take notes on it, but the best way to get to know the rules and mechanics is to just dive in, mix up the rules, accidentally give ranged weapons flanking, do a TPK as a DM.  But most importantly, have fun!

Good Heavens!

Just look at the time!

New York Comic-Con is next weekend!

Fuck Yeah!

The last time I have been to a convention was last year with my friend Andrew.  I don't remember the name of it, but it was video game related.  I remember getting a poster of the overworld of Dragon Warrior III, and missing out on the chance to see the Angry Video Game Nerd.  I also remember my ex basically cock-blocking me (metaphorically speaking) at every turn, because at the time apparently, having fun without her and not waiting on her hand and foot was something akin to blasphemy.

With Comic-Con, the last time I went it was just the Anime Festival, and it was 2009 with my friend Brandon.  The next two consecutive events failed to happen for me because: 2010, my friend's car breaks down the night before the event; 2011, apparently, hunting the big game (i.e. Bigfoot) was more important.

More Important than Comic-Con

This year, I will not be deterred, I will not be stopped.  Like Lady Godiva, I'm gonna go go go, there's no stopping me!  And this year, I have money to, I will get shit, more shit than I would know what to do with.

And the day after, it's D&D day, nerdgasm!